


Hound of Hades

by chameleontattoos



Series: "There's no pep talk like a military pep talk." [1]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Gen, Post-Horizon (Mass Effect)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2019-09-03
Packaged: 2020-10-06 04:24:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20500832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chameleontattoos/pseuds/chameleontattoos
Summary: Up until that point, Garrus hadn’t had much of a game plan beyondfind the commander.He hadn’t even been entirely sure what he’d do once he found her. But seeing her like that—so flat and silent anddefeated—helped him make up his mind.“Talkto me, Shepard,” he said softly, lowering himself onto the other end of the cold metal slab.“Horizon,” she replied. “It didn’t go according to plan. That’s all.”





	Hound of Hades

Shepard didn’t say a word on the way back up to the _ Normandy_. Her boot clunked rhythmically against the side of a recovered eezo canister as she stared out of the window.

Garrus wondered what she was thinking as she watched the buildings that made up the Horizon colony fall away beneath the shuttle. 

He ran a practised eye over her profile from across the cabin. Clenched jaw. Pinched outer-eye corner. Hunched shoulders. Either she was going to vomit, or she was angry. Really, _r__eally _ angry. 

Could be both. There had been a lot of empty hab pods down there. And then their little chat with Williams—that had gone downhill as well as sideways fast.

An armoured foot bumped against Garrus’ own. He looked up and found Grunt already looking back at him. The young krogan—he wasn’t usually so demonstrative, must’ve been the adrenaline—tilted his head in Shepard’s direction, a question in his eyes.

Garrus shook his head, glancing at her to check whether the dull clang of armour-on-armour had caught her attention. He didn’t fancy getting spaced for discussing the commander’s bad mood in front of the woman herself. 

She didn’t look up.

┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ ⟨ ⏣ ⟩ ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈

He went looking for her once he’d offloaded his gear. There was no sign of her in the CIC; he must have just missed her before she went to do her rounds of the lower decks.

The mess hall was empty of everyone but Gardner, Daniels and Donnelly. When asked if he’d seen Shepard, the ship’s cook could only offer a shrug. “Sorry, Vakarian. She must’ve come through while I was replacing those taps in the men’s.” Gardner gestured over Garrus’ shoulder at the engineers. “You might have better luck askin’ them.”

Daniels and Donnelly were sharing a bowl of levo food that looked like thinly sliced, whitish-yellow roots of some kind. 

“You want a crisp, Garrus?” Donnelly asked, holding out the bowl.

Daniels rolled her eyes. “He can’t eat our food, Ken.”

“Yeah, I’ll have to pass.” Garrus shrugged apologetically. “But have either of you seen the commander?”

“Oh, aye. She went into the gym, maybe… half an hour ago? Seemed in a right bad mood. I’d watch my knackers, if I were you.”

“_Kenneth. _”

┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ ⟨ ⏣ ⟩ ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈

_ A right bad mood _ sounded about right. No pun intended.

Garrus slowed his approach as he came up on the door of _ Normandy_’s training facilities, listening to the muffled sounds of Shepard unleashing hell on the fitness equipment. 

His 'knackers', whatever those were, would be fine, but it couldn’t hurt to take steps to avoid startling her and bruising a browplate on her elbow. Again. “Hey, EDI?”

“Yes, Agent Vakarian?”

“I’d like to speak to the commander, but I think some advance warning might be in order. Would you mind?”

“Of course, Agent Vakarian.”

After a moment, the lock blipped from red to green. The door slid open to reveal Shepard, hands on hips; the picture of human disgruntlement. “What do you need, Garrus? I’m a little busy right now.”

“You don’t look it.” She really didn’t; her cheeks were their usual shade of peach, and she’d barely broken a sweat. If he didn’t know better, Garrus might wonder if there was someone else in the gym with her making all that noise.

“So Cerberus ratcheted up my circulation. Doesn’t mean I can’t do cardio.” Shepard’s tone was dismissive, but there was a tightness in her shoulders that gave away her discomfort.

Garrus opened his mouth to address it, but she put up a hand. “I’m not in the mood for you to start going all C-Sec on my mental state, Vakarian.”

Was he that easy to read? He crossed his arms, leaning against the doorframe. “I don’t have to. I have working eyes.”

“Yeah, that seems to be going around,” Shepard muttered. She turned on her heel, moving with a heavy tread just shy of stomping as she retreated to a bench set along the wall. 

Garrus took stock of the room as he followed her in. Most of her frustration seemed to have been taken out on the dummies, although the hang-bar of one of the smaller punching bags was also bent a little out of shape. And Shepard—

Shepard sat with her head bowed and shoulders slumped, methodically raking her fingers through her hair. She looked wrecked.

Up until that point, Garrus hadn’t had much of a game plan beyond _ find the commander_. He hadn’t even been entirely sure what he’d do once he found her. But seeing her like that—so flat and silent and _ defeated_—helped him make up his mind.

“_Talk _ to me, Shepard,” he said softly, lowering himself onto the other end of the cold metal slab. 

“Horizon,” she replied. “It didn’t go according to plan. That’s all.”

Garrus kicked his feet out in front of him, feeling the sweet burn of his calf muscles as they came back down from the workout of his sniper’s crouch. “With the colonists, or with Williams?”

Shepard groaned. “Either. Both. Do we really have to talk about this?”

“Yeah, we really do. Chambers said she hadn’t seen you.”

“I don’t want to talk to Kelly.”

“I know.” Garrus waited for her to follow up with _ I don’t want to talk to you either_, or something to that effect, but it never came. Nor did anything else. Not even an _ I’m fine, Garrus_, and the fact that that wasn’t happening was all he needed to be completely sure that sitting there and trying to convince her to let him help her was a good idea. “Shepard. Please.”

“_Alright. _I’ll talk. Just…” She speared both hands into her hair and leaned back against the wall, shooting him a baleful look. “Give me a minute. Stubborn asshole.”

Garrus crossed his legs at the ankles, letting himself feel a tiny bit optimistic. It was no dam break, but it was something. “Take your time.”

They sat in silence as he waited for Shepard to gather her thoughts. It wasn’t as uncomfortable as it could have been. Thank the Spirits for small mercies.

Eventually, she sighed. “Ashley. She was so ready to write me off. And I’m _ pissed _about that, don’t get me wrong. But if I were in her position…” She kneaded her temples with her thumbs, forehead creasing. “I dunno if I wouldn’t have reacted the same way. I don’t blame her for thinking the worst. I was mincemeat on a slab. Anything could’ve been wired into me, and I wouldn’t have known until a button got pushed.”

“Joker didn’t write you off.” Garrus pointed out. “Neither did the good doctor.”

There was a pause. He got the feeling Shepard expected him to add a third, subjectively more obvious name. He didn’t. 

She looked at him sidelong. “Nobody else, eh?”

Garrus shrugged, feigning ignorance. “Oh, there’s one or two more, for sure. But I’m not here for them.”

“You’re here to _ talk_,” she said, in her _ dealing with an obnoxious subordinate _ voice. “You think if I asked around, I could root out the others?”

“Probably.” He allowed himself a proud trill for having gotten her to play along. “But, Shepard, listen. We—_they _ know you. And they know you’re doing the best you can. They’re not here because they believe in Cerberus. They’re here because they believe in _ you_.”

Shepard stood and began to pace, knotting her fingers together so tightly that Garrus was more than a little worried that her skinny human phalanges might fracture. “I’m not _ me _ any more, Garrus. No matter what sanctimonious bull the Illusive Man wants to spout about putting me back together exactly the way I was before I… Before.” She frowned deeper, jaw working, and her boots squeaked on the rubber flooring as she stopped pacing abruptly to look at him. “I hate this. All of it. And I’m…” she sighed heavily through her nose, returning to her seat on the bench. “Truth is, I’m scared. Haven’t been this scared since—shit, since Akuze.” She glanced at the Cerberus logo stencilled on the wall. “And that’s a whole… thing.”

That corporal, the one named Toombs. Hadn’t he said something about Cerberus being responsible for what happened to all those Marines? Nothing had come of the allegation, last Garrus had heard, but it was a hell of a thing to have on your conscience.

He hummed a sympathetic note, focussing on the part of her confession that he had at least _ some _ idea how to respond to. Cerberus-at-Akuze was beyond him, for now. “You’re not any less _ you _ for having a few cybernetic grafts, Shepard. Hell, half of _ my _ face is tech now, too. We’re a matched set.”

“Which of us got the shorter end of that stick, d’you think?” Shepard quipped, smiling wryly. The look in her eyes told him that she knew that he knew that she was deflecting, but that was alright. He’d gotten her to talk. They’d muddle through.

“I had a rocket explode right on top of me, you crash-landed on a planet in your hardsuit. I call that an even split.”

“Uh huh.” Her smile changed shape until it kind of resembled the one that appeared when she looked at Joker while his back was turned, plus something extra that he couldn’t quite decipher. “Hey. Thanks for not marking me down as a lost cause.”

“I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.” Garrus replied, nudging her ankle with his toe. “Well, except for this one sauna on the Citadel—”

Shepard laughed. “Nice, Vakarian. So I’m playing second fiddle to a super-heated box, huh?”

He grinned. “Of course not. You’re playing second fiddle to the mocktails.”

┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ ⟨ ⏣ ⟩ ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈

“Shepard.”

“Yeah.”

“Williams is full of shit.”

“Is she?”

“Have I ever been wrong about someone being full of shit?”

“...No.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I have more Shepard/Garrus in the works, but your guess is as good as mine in terms of when I'll get them all done. My writing brain has been mad at me lately :/
> 
> If you liked this, please consider following me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/solarfruit)!! It's mostly FE3H City over there right now but sometimes I make good goofs or, like. Talk about how cursed my ideal Subway sandwich is. It's a good time!!


End file.
